Thursday, September 4, 2008

Dating my spouse - Why?

My husband is a pretty flexible guy, and is willing to compromise on almost any issue. But one place that he sticks his foot down is on dates. He insists (and I’m glad that he does) that we take a date each and every week. We have four kids, so this sometimes seems like a pain when I have to find a babysitter every week. I’m going to start a dating series on Thursdays about how to make weekly dating work. But first, the why.
Good marriages take work - we all know this. What we tend to forget is that all this work doesn’t come naturally in marriage (it doesn’t anywhere else either, does it?). It doesn’t take long for communication to slip into something not a kind and considerate as it used to be. It’s easy to develop independent interests and hobbies that leave less time together. Then there’s fatigue from the kids, stress from work and the “oh, you’re not as perfect as I thought you were” blues - we really need a planned defense.
Dating is marriage maintenance and a one to defend and plan for a strong marriage. It prevents us from becoming just roomates — people who live together but otherwise have nothing in common. And it allows a weekly escape from the stresses of life where we can reconnect and build each other up. And it’s fun! It doesn’t have to be expensive, and can be as creative as you wish. Most of all, it provides a natural way to spend time together, restoring communication, having fun, and keeping the romance kindled.
In the next few weeks I’ll discuss some of the ways we’ve made dating work even with a bucketload of kids, cheap dates, and keeping dating creative.
Meanwhile, visit Still Dating my Spouse. (I just joined the site, and really like the content - but there’s no affiliation to this liketrees blog ).

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